Ohhh rant shit bla bla fuckface bla

The last week has pretty much been the worst week I'v ever had from what I can remember.
(-minus Shadow dying-R.I.P baby) ..


I've eaten sooo so so so so much shit - why?
Cos I've slipped right back into the fucked up blackhole of the town I'm from.
My day here:
Wake up at 2pm
Coffee, eat, eat, eat, eat.
Lay in bed with tv - eat, eat, eat, eat.
Go have a smoke at 9pm
Lay in bed with tv and eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat.
Finally fall asleep at some fucked up time in the morning.

My day in Darwin:
Wake up naturally at 8am
Coffee - cleaning, shower
11am - Pool - sweat it out in the hot sun
4pm - come back - sit around the table and talk to everyone - have a few beers
9pm - decent meal for dinner
9:30-10 - Sleep. Just sleep. As soon as my head hits the pillow.

Seems like a boring day but I was happy.
There was no smoking. No over eating.
No solitary.

I just feel so fucked up depressed here.

I still need to take a pregnancy test - but this shit seems to over rule that right now.

I'm so freaking fat - beautifully tanned ;-) - but fat haha.