Feeling like a stupid, young girl.

I'm still on 58 today. I'm very pleased with myself.
I'm 4kilos away from my first goal weight - That's not much. I have no goal for when I need to get there, preferrably in the next month and a half.
But the feeling I get is that this is going to be very hard to achieve because it's such a small amount of weight.

Maybe I'll do a test over the next week.
It'll only be for 5-7 days. I'm going to cut my calories down to approx 400c for the day. I haven't restricted calories in an extremely long time. Like, seriously restricted calories - so! 400.
Todays menu:
Dinner @ 6:30 -
165c - Salmon with lettuce (cucumber, carrots, lemon juice dressing)
Snacks through out day/night
Olives - 30c + more olives, which hardly adds up to anything.

Pretty exciting menu, right?? - I'm not counting in liquid calories because I like my tea.
But I'm trying to see if restricting my calories will get me somewhere. It might work because it'll be a bit of a shock to my body and my body might just go along with it.. right? haha
I've gotta do a fair funkin amount of cleaning today, too - should work off something?

++++


So, I don't know whether this is classified as maybe like a semi-date??
My friend Jez - the one who came with me to a party once when I was seeing that kid M off the dating site?
Jez sent me a message on Facey asking me if I wanted to go around to his place on Thursday afternoon/night for a joint and then he'll make us dinner. Usually, we just meet each other at the pub and get messy together. We don't really hook up anymore, we act like friends that get along awesomely. I've never been to his place before, he's never asked me. He's usually seeing some girl when we hang out, and I'm usually seeing some boy - but lately, after having met one of them.. he's started saying things to me like, "if I wasn't seeing so-and-so then I'd want to start something with you" ... then he tells me last week he dropped the latest girl because he can't see anything long-term with her.

And now here he is asking me to go to his place for a joint and dinner? Am I looking too far into this?? (speak of the devil, just got a chat message off him on facey) - Maybe he just wants some lovin'?
Whatever.
I don't even know whether he's the style of person I'd want to be involved with.
And I strictly mean, physical appearance style y'know?
He looks like a hipster muso (which I guess he is - he has money, lives in the heart of the city in a trendy suburb and plays in an indi band)
He wears stupid stuff like vintage t-shirts. Tight jeans. Leather jackets. Flannos.
At the moment, I only seem to be attracted to greasy surfer types. Long, blondish, ratty hair. Tanned skin. Open face with dopey, blue eyes. Skatey kind of look.
Jez is extremely attractive.. in personality and in the face.
I've got a feeling he's too good for me.
But, I have a huge suspicion that I only think he's too good for me because he's clever.
I don't normally hang around clever boys like that.. only dumb boys.

I don't know. I'm just ranting. I've always had a crush on this kid from the first time I met him.
I was disgustingly drunk and slutting it up with this boy from this really awesome, semi-famous Aussie band (which I'm still stoked about) .. but left that kid and ended up talking to Jez.
Fuck he has nice eyelashes. Such straight, good teeth. And a big nose.
I like big noses. It's masculine.
And we like getting drunk together..

Am I thinking about this too much? I think so.