Recent Monged.

Hm, wow.

A lot of things have happened in the past few days but I just can't really get excited about it..
I just started the pill (not really one of the main points) .. I only started it so I can skip my period in the next couple of weeks

** Fingers Crossed It Actually Works ** ..

I wouldn't usually care about skipping my period but the next couple of weeks are quite important and I'd really prefer to not have the thing hanging around.

1. It'll be my first week of Darwin. I plan to do a lot of moving and rushing around, wearing my bikini pretty much 24/7. I don't need the extra bloat or hassle of having to think about it.
2.. and this is the main reason.. Lee (Brazillian) will be taking a holiday in Darwin for this 'period week' and with the amount of time I plan to be spending with him - I wouldn't be surprised if at some point we were in bed together..
So I have valid reasons for it. I'm just hoping I don't put on weight from this.

The other night, like I mentioned - I actually went through with agreeing to meet up with Lee. It was just normal. I don't know why I get myself so worked up over things like this. Anyway, I met him at the movies in the city.. Immediately I realised the sober differences. If he wasn't all foreign and Brazillian - then I bet he'd be a massive loser. I bet that in Brazil he was a massive loser. Even my best friend agreed with me yesterday when I mentioned it, said that she realised that when I first met him. .. Now, there's nothing wrong with being a loser but it just kinda shows how much of an idiot I was to think that he was too good for me. My beer goggles are so insanely fuzzy that I thought he looked too good for me.. but I do deserve him and maybe better.. but that doesn't matter. He's a lovely guy. ((((.. Everyone go see 500 Days Of Summer. .. I enjoyed this movie so much! I wish I'd had someone else there to talk to about it. I realised that I'm this Summer character and I'm sure a lot of other girls would also think the same.. but it just opened my eyes to a lot of things. I wanna see it again))))

After the movies we went for a walk around the harbour and then stopped at a pub. It was great just sitting there and talking to him properly. All I could see was from his waist up - It was good cos then he was normal, cool Lee again.. Or maybe it was just the beer I was drinking.
So I'll be seeing him again on Friday at the Good Club. yay.

Yesterday I was talking to a boy that we travelled down with last week.
This boy is alright, but also a bit of a dropkick. He used to be completely beach. Blonde hair, tanned skin, tall with a surfers body.. always down the beach with his board and then one night he turned muso.. but gay muso tryhard. We got talking to him again cos we bought our pills off him at the festival the other week and he kept in touch.. and then invited himself down to Sydney with us.

Point is, I think he thinks he's coming with us this Friday. He said something yesterday about it. I must have been drunk and invited him last week on the train. Haha woops.. So I'm scared he's going to expect something cos there's a bit of that kind of tension there.
.. There are a few boys hanging around even though I deny there are ..

It nearly got me into trouble last week. I was with Lee at the Good Club and the boy from my street that I was with at the festival the other week tried to get into Good Club but was denied, lucky. He was going there for the sole reason to see me. . definitely avoided a doozey. He'll be back again this Friday, quite sure. His band is playing at some venue down the road. Dang. This has happened more than once but this time would have been worse cos I've already fucked Lee over a bit, like when he came out to see me one time and I was with him, but ended up running off and hooking up with someone else.. but he forgave me (which is also an indicator that maybe he isn't the coolest kid like I thought). So if this was to happen again, I'm fair sure he wouldn't be speaking to me again.

This week is gonna be a massive good time at Good Club.

Last One ='(
Old friends are coming and we're meeting a few people there.
My friend wants to bender through Friday and Saturday.. which means we'll be dunking the pills on Friday - coming back for a mass smoke at 7 in the morn and then starting on the goon after that for the farewell BBQ on Saturday that'll go throughout the day/night. There will probably be a lot of weed involved cos there are a few weed dealers going and maybe, just maybe more pills. That'd be nice. So on Sunday I'm going to be wrecked, unless my friend wants to keep going but I don't wanna be that shit for the plane on Monday morning.. Although, if the pills come through on Saturday, then I'm pretty sure we'll be wanting that body numbing smoke on Sunday morning.

I'm heaps hardcore.

I got bored with the camera yesterday, before the pub.
So take a look. Last time you'll see the gross!
It'll get better.






Man, I gotta get those knees into shape!

.... I'd really like to be passionate about something again. To be in awe. Overwhelmed. Filled up. Satisfied by something. I want to have a reaction to something and to be interested... just like this guy on a show I'm watching. He spends all day and all night studying Jellyfish, puts "his life in danger" to try and get a bit closer to them. .. Where the fuck is my motivation?