Apologies and stuff.

Freakin' out about the whole dilio of Darwin//

It's funny how things come good when you make a commitment to leaving where you're at.
Stopped seeing internet kid M. He said "You meant to do this, you meant to make me keen and then leave" .. bit silly of him, but whatever.

I went out on Saturday night with some older friends I haven't seen in a while. One of them pointed out a boy I had apparently slept with. I didn't know that was him. He looks completely different. So I went and said hi and that my friend pointed out we knew each other from.. whatever.
I said I wouldn't have known it was him otherwise, and he said the same thing. I think we've both changed a lot - but anyway. I went to the movies with him last night. I know what his intentions are because he's aware I'm leaving in 7 days, but he made it completely obvious this morning when he texted me that we should find an empty house to "have some fun together" before I leave. I told him I wasn't stupid and he should have just said that from the start instead of trying to be all nice about it by taking me to the movies. That, to me just isn't being honest. I'd prefer just a straight up "let's just have sex until you leave" .. but I said I'm not that easy anymore and I dunno whether it'll happen haha.

Another boy, I just got a text from. We've been on and off in hooking up for the past 9 years (fuck haha) .. We were young when we first got together. We've never had sex. Just spent lots of nights together in gay cuddly stuff. Anyway, he's invited me over to his place tonight. Which is strange, because apparently he has a g.f// A very sleazy, dirt g.f /// but still.
He also has a kid. Hmm.
He's probably the most attractive boy I know.. but he's caused me a lot of hassle before with his ex g.f. She's cornered me in the club. Told me I'm messing with the wrong ex. Gotten her friends to intimidate me and push me around.. and also spat in my hair one time on the bus.
Drama!



I didn't eat yesterday at all. Or today. I'm feeling pretty stoked about my body at the moment. It's getting there.

I want a tummy tuck.


Also, apologies to my lack of comments and responses to comments. I'm in a bit of a plateau picklejam and I just can't find the motivation to do anything at the moment that has anything to do with anything.
If that makes sense.






My stomach is burning up! Acid! Acid! .. Means I'm hungry. Means I'm getting somewhere.