Rant For Happiness

I just had a bit of a meltdown.
I've been sitting infront of the tv all day today. No communication with anyone - not my fault, it just turned out that way.. anyway, my drunken uncle and mum came into the room while I was watching a tv show and they just kept talking and talking.. and super loud.
They've been out the back all day, I don't know why they came in to wreck my time. Anyway, I had a bit of a spit at them. Asked why they needed to come in here when there was a tv and lounges in the backroom.
She psyched at me - so I did it back. I couldn't help crying as I was shouting at them both.
I hate crying when I'm angry. I feel like a dickhead.

So anyway, now I'm in my room and I've got my music up loud. And I'm going to keep it like that.
I don't care whether she gets angry.


My best friend ignored me last night.
We went to the pub, she came down after some coaxing - but not from me, from our friend.. She ignored my messages and calls. I'm not sure what I've done wrong.. but whatever. Maybe this means I'll stop smoking weed, cos I only do it with her.
Fuck.

I want to get the fuck out of this shitty fucking life.
I feel bad that I'll be leaving my mum behind, but after today - I doubt she really wants me here anyway. She repeatedly told me to fuck off... so um, I guess that means I'm free to go where I like.