Lorikeets are having a better time.

I'm feeling hopelessly useless right now. I've got no motivation to do anything but I keep complaining when nothing is happening. I desperately need someone to talk to, to be with.. to do something with but I'm too scared to reach out first. Rejection would just not sit well with me at the moment. I don't understand why I'm being like this.

Might be a combination of weed and being inside all freakin' day.



I had a message from a boy today (who was mentioned in previous posts, B who used to stay over all the time) .. saying he missed me. And then when I said that he should come over one night soon and hang out, he just replied with "ok".


I'm sitting outside in the sun right now.. It's very windy, but pretty nice. If only the moment wasn't spoiled by the reflection of my double-chin in the screen of my laptop.
I'm looking at myself right now. Brows furrowed. Pale skin with big, open pores. Eyes squinty. Shiny, red nose. Pimples that look like I've added a few extra piercings to my face. Sour, downturned mouth.. and I think I can see a hint of a little too many moustache hairs. Haha, ew. Why does the hair look so damn obvious right now??
It's gross. Gotta do something about that shiz of a face.

There are two lorikeets sitting next to me as well.. just eating out of the bowl we've got for them. One is looking right at me. Stupid fucker is gonna poo on me soon, I know it. Just like that bitch of a lorikeet I own. Always pooing on me.


So yesterday, it was alright.
I didn't go out with my friend last night for weed. I just stayed home. Hoorah!
Yesterdays food was a lot better than usual, because I didn't go out.
Some vegetable thingy - 200c
Weetbix - 170
Banana - 140


OH gosh, now the lorikeets are having sex right next to me.
You should hear the noises.. haha ew. I need a camera.

So yeah, yesterday wasn't too bad at all! Quite proud of myself.
But to save myself from going insane - I'll most likely be out again tonight for a smoke.
Then I'll come home and stuff myself with all the lamingtons my mum just bought.
WOO HOO.