Okay I just need a start over.
I'm just blobbing along on 55 - going up and then going down.
Nothing's happening and I've become bored.
I need a do-over. A new plan. A routine.
Today:
Chips - 300
Yoghurt - 300
Rice and chilli shit - bout 3-400.
So today has been a giant day, again. I'm gonna go vomit soon.. as soon as my mum gets out of the funkin kitchen and sits somewhere she can't hear me...
Lately, I can't even vomit right. It's just yuck. Everything is so yuck.
B is so skinny. He's about 6'3 (maybe more) and 70kg.
His waist and hips and stomach is so flat. Everything's so flat. It's good.
He keeps touching my stomach and fat - I can't stand it but at the same time, it feels normal and comfortable and I don't feel fat at all.
I can't be comfortable otherwise I will be fat. Fuck.
I can't keep having one good day out of 7 where I'm actually happy with my body. I need to make it more than that.. so I'll be setting up a plan and sticking to it, even if I go crazy.
SHIT
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