Mmm embarassing.
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Summer Challenge Question Number Threeeee!
Why?
Okay, ummm - First word that comes to mind is Vanity.
I was always a really picky eater. Skinny. Flat chested. Once I hit puberty (gosh I hate that word) I ended up eating a whole heap of shit and being gross.
Once I'd lost the weight and was nearing skinny again - I realised just how many more opportunities it opened to being attractive and getting what I want.
There. That's it. My answer is plain and simple... Get back to being where I was before and when people were interested.
But that puts me into another kind of problem. I don't claim to have Anorexia.. or Bulemia - even though I do actually have bulemia, I don't want to admit it because I can snap out of things very easy. I get bored and over it. I could get over this eating thing right now if I really wanted to. I'm just trying to lose weight the easiest, most simple way I know how.. and I've gotta say - I've been doing this longer than I've been doing anything else - except smoking weed and drinking booze, I guess.. I'll keep it going - it does me good.
Hmm, to make it clear tho cos I don't think I have before.. I'm a very Go With The Flow kind of person. I'll make a decision to do something and the next day, something better pops up to keep me entertained and I'm over it.
I dunno whether this ED is the same kind of thing or not... Maybe I'm just saying it is so I'm not disappointed when I fail?? .. Gotta get someone to tell me what I'm thinking haha.
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Um, I wrote all that yesterday but didn't post it.
Went to Good Club.
Came home after a great night out and B came over and we had a good sleep together.
I dunno what's going on with it all. But at the moment - I guess this is okay.
When you talked about the "go with the flow" mentality, I think I feel you on that. I get hooked on things, and then get bored and find something else. I tell people I have an addictive personality, but I just choose my addictions well.
ReplyDeleteRight now I'm trying to keep up my dedication to this. It's kinda hard, but whatev. Mastery is the skill of sticking to something when the initial interest is gone, and the comfort of familiarity has yet to settle in.
I like your answer. I wasn't sure many people would answer that question, because it is sort of esoteric, but I think it could get some damn good responses.
Good luck with B. And I'm sure you look amazing.
i know what you mean about snapping out of shit easily. like, if enough people tell you to gain weight, youll kind of be like "yea, maybe i should..." and then BAM youre 200 lbs. but just stay focused and if you think that its a problem, trying going without it for a week. if you can do that then youre good.
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